Musings of a mad Mind - 5

May 1999 will remain etched in my mind very vividly and why wont it. Imagine a girl of 18, weighing 62kg, just drop 15kg in less than 25 days, without making any sort of effort!!!!!!

Yes, thats me and i didnt realise this weight loss until my entire wardrobe seemed to be too loose for me and my jeans were falling off my waist :)

I smile today but those few days were of total worry to my parents. I didnt fall ill, didnt feel tired and yet i was losing weight like a deflating balloon. Coinciding with all this was my grandma's failing health. I guess thats why it took my parents to see this drastic change in me and it wasn't until a relative mentioned the fact that i looked very thin, on the day of my grandma's death that my parents took note of this.

Many people associated my weight loss with my grandma's passing away. No doubt that i was upset, but i dont think that it would have got me depressed, simply because, she was suffering alot and I was glad that the torture finally ended for her on June 22nd 1999.

Well after all this came the act of taking me to a million doctors, doing a million tests and they all said what i had been saying for a long time, I WAS JUST FINE AND HEALTHY. But as parents the worry seldom ceases and i think till this very date they are worried about my weight loss.

I have a tendency to think that God has something planned for us and only He knows why he does somethings. I'm assuming that this was also an act of God to make me a healthier person and help me play my game with more vigor and zest. (It is easier when your light on your feet ;)

But there was more to the weight loss than just the physical look. I changed internally too. I was never short of confidence ever, but the new look made me different. Its a feeling that i have till date.

It started with my sense of dressing. I was this salwar kameez type, who wore jeans and t shirts consious of my bulging sides, but now i didnt have to worry about it. The way people looked at me was not the same. I felt that when i was fat, it was automatically assumed that i was the non-fun type, studious and boring and all those and trust me i was none of that. But with the change in physical appearance came this feeling among those around me (barring a few and i guess they know who they are) that i was COOL!!! Whatever that means, but i am guessing you get my point.

I've wondered if i too have judged many a person with this kind of a pre conceived notion. If i have, I apologise to all those whom i have thought of differently. Its a misconception. Being thin, doesn't change the person you are. You only lose weight, not character but it takes alot of time for people to see it.

I may sound confused here but I'm not. I'm just telling you how people really are. For women, the way they look is very important to be accepted among people and thats a lousy way to judge people. I say this because i have seen both sides. It can sometimes get depressing. Today when people say, Aarti you need to put on weight, I go back to the days when people would say, Aarti you need to lose weight!!!! All this changed within days for me, no expense mind it, no talwalkars, no fitness one or any another weight claims by VLCC can match what God did for me..

Enough has been said about all this.
College life was so much fun duing 1999 - 2001. More to come